What Does It Mean To Be Successful?
Citing the Oxford Dictionary, being successful describes an individual who has achieved fame, wealth or social status. If you refer to other sources for the definition of being successful, you too will realise their similarity, describing individuals with an external appearance of materialistic possessions and powerful influences over others. Coincidentally, this is widely portrayed as an ideal by the media today. By no means am I attempting to judge whether this is right or wrong, but rather, to explore the potential consequences of pursuing such an ideal and if there is an alternative perspective of success that we can consider and adopt.
In today’s capitalistic society, the reality is that certain level of financial security is required for sustenance. The challenge lies in determining how much is sufficient and the ability to differentiate between our needs and wants. Failure to distinguish these for ourselves can set us on a life of dissatisfaction and misery as we compare endlessly with the extravagant lifestyle of others and chase after having more of whatever is perceived as the latest trend.
Not wanting to sound cliché, but each of us has the authority and right to define what success means for ourselves. Start by looking inward and decide for yourself what is important to you and only you. I began by reviewing some of my key decisions and actions in the past, and realise that they were made with the intention to uphold integrity, responsibility, harmony and growth. Next, I explored and experimented with small and easy habits that build upon these values. It could be simple acts like choosing to listen first before responding, avoiding judgement, setting aside time each day for reading or listening to an audiobook!
Slowly but gradually, integrate an arsenal of small habits based on what you value into your daily life. Do not belittle these small daily habits as their effects will compound over time, shaping both your character and influencing those around you. How you can “discover” these effects would be through frequent personal reflections and gathering feedback from the people around you. You might be pleasantly surprised that people start noticing some positive changes in you even before you realise it yourself!
Coming back to why I first identify what’s important to me. Through my own experience, I realised that I felt inner peace and fulfilment when I lived according to my values. The sense of satisfaction is immense and lasting when I noticed how much I have grown professionally and as an individual, or when I have positively influenced someone in my life. That is how I define success for myself. As for financial security, even though I only have a rough idea of how much money I need for my daily sustenance at this point in time, I know for sure that happiness in my life is not dependent on material possessions and lavish lifestyles.
Determine for yourself what is important to you. The widely adopted definition of success could work for you, or it could be some form of variation from my approach of living by personal values. Most importantly, don’t end up with a life of temporary pleasures, unrealistic comparisons and achievements that do not mean anything to you.